PS. On the Kelly Holmes Cafe...

Dear Kelly Holmes, I read in today's Courier that you are planning on opening a chain of juice bars. Now, opening a nice café is one thing but really you cannot nick my idea for juice bars as mentioned in Tonbridge Blog a few months back (scroll down if you don't believe me!) I also went on ad naseum about the benefits of the Jason Vale juice diets and recipes in the Tonbridge Town Crier My Shout page (whot I write) under the heading: The Juice Apprentice. Jason Vale calls himself The Juice Master you see!  So Kelly, you may have pots of cash these days but that is my idea so lay off! The name of my juice bars chain? why "Mr. Juice" of course!!

Gold Blend....

Tonbridgeblog loves the idea of the Kelly Holmes Café in Hildenborough. Just a shame it's not in Tonbridge instead I say. What the neighbours can possibly complain about on this one is beyond me. I mean it's not like she's proposing a Fracking rig in the courtyard is it! It looks like being a nice looking eatery, a real alternative to greasy spoons or pubs. Look what was there before; Kelly might have fond memories of the place but, let's face it, in the later years Fags and Mags was a right eye sore. I wish her luck in Hildenbrough, because the truth is it would almost certainly have worked better in Tunbridge Wells, she obviously has  a soul to be so romantic about the old place. I for one will be supporting the place and, yes, Kelly I will be biking there. Earn your lunch by a bit of exercise I say. Too many of us are becoming too lazy in both mind and body and we should all get out more. As for the name of the café? I think I've guessed it: Kelly's Golden Dream....

Floody Tonbridge....

Here's the poem which I read/performed at last night's Roundel poetry evening. It seemed to go down well enough so I thought I'd share it with you all. Now, you have to imagine me standing there in the Rose and Crown Hotel wearing a snorkel and mask on top of my head. I kid you not and have about 70 witnesses!

 

Floody Tonbridge

 

Tonbridge, Hildenborough, East Peckham and Yalding
We were on the telly … like that Clare Balding.
Cameron came, but Clegg? He never
All them politicians out braving the weather
Were they bothered ‘bout our feelings and views
Or were it enough to be on’t six o’clock news?!

We’ll never forget that night, the wind roaring
Rain hurtling down, God it was pouring!
Christmas Eve, when we should have been writing n wrapping
The flippin rain kept rat a tap tapping

Then, soon after, they opened the gates, over at Leigh
Resulting in unmanned canoes and boats a floating on by
Anything, usually on the banks so neatly
Went white water rafting if not tethered completely!

Commuters are moaning in First Class compartments
Questions being asked in Government departments.
Home owners, they say, given one hour to go?
Shouldn’t the barrier have regulated the flow?
Should houses be built by the banks of the river?
The answer my friends must surely be never!
No need to discuss, no need to deliberate
Just take a look at the level, on the post, from 1968!

Oh, there’ll be many a claim for damages, you bet,
The insurance’ll make sure that most of them met.
But will the Environment Agency put its hands up and say
“It was us. We got it wrong on that day!”

Will they floody heck!!

Tunbridge Wells Half Marathon anyone?....

Just had a chat in the shop with Caroline Dunmall of local homeless charity, Bridge Trust, who tells me that they are always looking for runners for local fun runs and the like. They have entered a team of ten for the Tunbridge Wells Half Marathon which is coming up on Sunday March 2nd. I'm afraid Tonbridge Blog is a little out of shape having not trained for quite a while now so I had to decline. But there must be others out there who are willing to put themselves through the pain barrier for a good cause. Interested? Then contact her at the Bridge Trust on 01732 368363....

Bridge Trust....

Tonbridge, Floody Tonbridge....

On a lighter note the Roundel Poetry Evening at the Rose and Crown tonight, is a sell out. That's more than 60 poetry fans going along for readings by local poet, Margaret Beston, and also by Geraldine Paine, followed by my favourite bit the open mic' slot. There's also musical accompaniment jazz style and a glass of wine. Not bad for a fiver! No wonder it sold out so quickly. Poetry is indeed alive and well in Tonbridge and I'm very much looking forward to reading, actually I prefer to call it performing, my poem, "Floody Tonbridge" what I wrote....

Council to charge extra for under water parking!...

When I saw the headline in today's Courier I almost spat my tea out in shock but the truth is that this is a lot more complex than it would at first seem. As the director of planning at TMBC (the council to you and me) is quoted as having said the review of charges has to take into account the balance of revenue and the vitality of the town centre. Wise words Steve but do you really mean it when it seems quite clear that the right hand doesn't know what the left is doing? Timing in announcements is crucial and this is classic bad timing. Economy still depressed, consumer confidence at an all time low, the rise and rise of internet shopping and, not least, Tonbridge has just had a natural disaster of its own with the floods over Christmas. Maybe the council have decided to charge extra for the novelty of under water parking!!
Parking charges in town centres always seem too high to me and, I should think, to most people. In a way it's just a form of stealth tax anyway. That said the car parks always seem to be spilling over with cars (and sometimes water!) so there's no doubt that they're in demand. I was over at Pembury Hospital last night for reasons I won't go into now and, though I have an major issue with hospitals charging for parking, I have to say that I wish that Tonbridge town centre would use the same system. Barrier entry, no limit to how long you can stay, pay at a ticket machine just before you leave. That way there's no worry about staying longer in that shop, trying on a new pair of jeans in the sale at Beales or meeting a friend and lingering over a second coffee because you're enjoying their company. It works, it would boost trade, it's simple and would avoid the need for the goons (parking wardens) to be hovering over your car when there's a minute left on your ticket. If the brains at the council would change all the car parks to that simple workable system I'd settle for trading that off for paying slightly more for parking. Shoppers would be happy, traders would be happy and I'd be ecstatic....

Where's Humphrey Bean?...

In other news Wetherspoons has reopened so you'll be able to go and get your pint and curry for six quid again. Hopefully without having to wade through two feet of water to the bar!...

Swimming Pool flooding update....

Walking past the Tonbridge Swimming Pool just a few minutes ago, peering through the window I noticed two things. One: there were three official looking men in suits sat around what should be a café table scratching their heads and looking very concerned and serious. Not surprising at all really when I then noticed the second thing. Scaffolding around the pool, no water in the pool. No swimming for a good while then by the looks of things. The good news is that there was no obvious damage in evidence to the indoor pool floor so it looks as though the main problem will be in making it pass health and safety measures. For once I'm saying this in all seriousness, instead of in the case of the usual utterance of that tired phrase. Let's face it you wouldn't want your lovely heated pool to be contaminated with river water and the debris it washed up during the floods. Think I'll steer clear for a while though and let the keenos be the guinea pigs. So that knocks my New Year fitness regime back to about, probably March/April then!...

TJRFC badly damaged by floods....

More bad news on the flooding in Tonbridge. The Juddians Rugby Club has some serious damage. As an ex player for the club this news is heart breaking on so many levels. The TJs have been riding high in recent years having spent money on players, equipment and, not least a new clubhouse. Anyone who's seen it may have noticed that the building is raised up, almost as if on stilts, so I was amazed this morning to hear one of the guys at the club tell me how bad the damage has been. The figure of £150,000 was being talked about. Now presumably the insurance will take care of much of that but, nevertheless, it's still a massive headache for all concerned. The pitches will drain and be playable after a few weeks but the clubhouse has to be in working order and hygienic otherwise there will be no more home games for this season. Again it raises the question of whether the floods were just a natural disaster or was there indeed a fault with the flood barrier. Tonbridge Blog has heard various rumours and it should be stressed that they are just that, rumours with perhaps some grounding in fact. Firstly there's the theory that the Leigh barrier was partially opened to allow the river water flow to be regulated and when the operators tried to close it one of the flaps was stuck. So the solution seemed to be to open the gates fully in order to release the stuck flap. This may have worked but also may have caused the surge in the flow which had a damaging effect on the town and, perhaps even worse, downstream in East Peckham and Yalding. The other theory, and one which the authorities seem to be sticking with, is that the levels at the flood barrier were so high, perhaps because the forty year old system in need of an upgrade, that the Environment Authority had no choice but to raise the barrier to allow water to be dispersed down river. Either way the residents and businesses of Tonbridge and the surrounding villages need some quick answers. No cover up please just honest, blunt answers. I'll have a bet though that we don't get these answers unless they are wrung out of the people involved....

Floods in Pictures. Boxing Day....

Angel Centre car park on Boxing Day

The Racecourse Sportsground becomes more like a sailing course

I took a walk out on Boxing Day to see the extent of the flooding in the High Street area....

Tonbridge Park is a lake!

The kids don't seem to mind it too much!

This is becoming all too regular for the Tonbridge Juddians 1st XV pitch

The water was pretty much over the Town Lock

Floods in pictures. Christmas Eve....

click to see the river in torrent

The river almost up to road level

Here are some of the photos TonbridgeBlog took of the river and floods on Christmas Eve. The video clips gives a glimpse at the ferocity of the waters once the flood barrier had been opened. Quite frightening it was actually to see the force of nature at work....


To the left of the picture is one of the rowing boats from the submerged jetty stuck at the bridge

The Great Flood 2013....

Having just read the "The Great Flood 2013" report in the Courier I now fully realise just how lucky I've been in escaping any damage. If I lived in the town centre or by the river my home could have been ruined on Christmas Eve. If my shop had been South of the river instead of part way up a hill I could have spent all of Christmas day fishing for floating books and clearing up the mess! Thankfully none of this happened and I'm very grateful. There's no doubt that it has effected sales in the shop but I'm confident that we'll catch that up and anyway it seems so trivial to think like that when other shop keepers lives and livelihoods were at stake. It's heart warming to see that there was an army of volunteers helping with the clear up operation as pictured in the Courier. Wonderful stuff. The Dunkirk Spirit surfaces yet again. I've often looked at pictures of the 1968 floods in the local history books on sale in my shop and now pretty much everyone in Tonbridge will now know someone who has been effected in the Christmas Floods of 2013. Newspapers can be a bit prone to exaggeration but their headline this time seems very apt....